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Posts Tagged ‘dying’

Sometimes we all need perspective. We complain about our bad day, the traffic, the wait at the Starbucks… we curse our life. Our luck. Tonight they pulled Type Geek’s brother off of the machines. The constant transfusions that were keeping him alive, stopped. An IV drip kept him sedated and pain-free.

Meanwhile, I waited on impatient people. A Saturday night of delays, refires, wait times, and people who cursed their luck to get the table below the speaker or the beer 8 tickets deep behind 16 multi ingredient cocktails. They should thank the universe that they had the chance to wait for a table, to drink a beer or have their food refired. Someone somewhere isn’t so lucky. Someone is having their hand held as they slowly pass. Some painfully, some quietly, some alone, with no one to hold their hand and say good-bye, thank them for their friendship, their love, their existence.

We are all guilty of the complaints. Maybe for a few days, a week or even a month, we can consider that we have so much more than someone else and that getting the wrong drink from Starbucks is a small miniscule thing.

Hug the people you love. Tell them that they matter. Live your days because someone else can’t.

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His brother is dying. Maybe not today, but soon. He allowed a problem, an illness, to fester without care for so long, that now even organ transplantation may not be enough. Bleeding doesn’t stop, body doesn’t heal, mothers become histrionic and require tranquilizers and brothers try to stay strong for everyone.  All I can offer Type Geek is an ear, shoulder or embrace. No words help.

Type Geek and I were on a super pleasant dinner date, halfway into a bottle of wine, when mom kept calling. I told him to call her while I ran off and used the restroom. I came back to find him rather ashen. I waited a moment and asked what was wrong. Apparently his brother was rushed to the emergency room after being found in his room vomiting blood and bleeding from an ulcerated skin wound that wasn’t healing. Sigh. He opted to finish dinner and have me sleep over still; there wasn’t anything he could do. Surgery was scheduled for the morning. Until post surgery, he was useless to the mix. 

Saturday morning we lazed on his couch after breakfast, I rubbed his feet as he looked at mid-century furniture on-line and we both drank coffee. He told me that he didn’t think his brother was going to pull through this, and I tried to reassure him that he would, of course he would. Only, Sunday evening I received a text that said the family was  “saying goodbye”. Bleeding wasn’t stopping. The doctors had little hope and suggested the family rally and make their peace. Monday was spent bedside, mother heavily tranquilized, with Type Geek keeping everyone calm. The bleeding had slowed, but it hadn’t stopped. The doctors said that it is now up to the brother as to whether he survives this week. It was a miracle he made it until Monday. I spent the entire day yesterday at work trying to figure out what to write, what to say. I’m left without many words here. All I can do is be present and receptive and supportive, nothing else I could say, or do, will make a difference here. So, I find myself unable to write anything clever and witty for you today. I am not a religious person, but I ask that everyone keep good energy in their hearts for Type Geek and his family.

Thank you everyone for all of your support of my journey and the tales along the way. I really do appreciate every one of you readers.

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