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Can a single week put bigger things into perspective? When what I think is a late night bootie call actually turns out to be a snuggle call? When I think a man is a distraction, only to blink and six months later realize that he might be the main event?

At a red light he asked for smooches. Literally used the word smooch.

Let me back track. Earlier in the week we had discussed seeing each other after I left work. It was a light evening at the restaurant and I assumed that his invitation was like all his others. It would be late, we would get naked, have sex and sleep, we would wake and one of us would make coffee, but I would make breakfast, then he would drive me to the train and we would part ways. This time however, I received a text message that told me I wasn’t getting sex. That we could only snuggle. Snuggle? Really? Well, casual sex is not casual snuggling.

He picked me up from the corner near his house, for days the rain was persistent and fierce, and I was far too cold and tired to walk from the train. In the car something shifted. The first thing I noticed was that he stopped at the entry of his driveway, I paused and realized that he was doing it in order to drop me closer to the front door, so I wouldn’t need to walk in the rain. Later, in the house, we stood in the kitchen and I talked him into having a few bites of chicken salad before bed as I massaged his shoulders and listened to him talk about his day. He talked openly about his stress, his concerns with work and I just listened. We then proceeded to do our respective night-time rituals and met in bedroom in our pajamas. Usually we are naked sleepers, however usually sex is involved. Crawling into bed he chose the outside of the spoon and nuzzled against my neck. We chatted a bit longer and as i realized that, in our exhausted state, we hadn’t smooched, at all, ao, I craned my neck back and demanded one before falling asleep. We changed positions a few times in the night, but in the morning we were still touching in some way. I crawled out to start the coffee and crawled back in, waking him. As the coffee brewed, we talked about random stuff and as I was going to leave to get the coffee he grabbed me and said he needed a few more minutes of snuggling first. Umm, how cute is that? So, it was a super sweet morning, nuzzling was fabulous, my breakfast of pasta pancake, beans and eggs was tasty and coffee was satisfying. I showered quickly and in the hall way, he kissed me and his hands did things they shouldn’t start 5 minutes before one needs to leave, as he whispered in my ear, that if I was available for a shag that night, or the next, I should come over. Oh Type Geek.

So, I guess to sum up this post, which I started days before finishing, Type Geek is starting to become more affectionate in a less casual manner. He’s also doing little things like dropping me closer to doors and opening doors for me, when it isn’t necessary. Cute little things.  It’s sweet.It’s thicker with meaning than my showing up and fucking him, feeding him and leaving. He gave me a few looks last week that were different, more filled with promise, as he pulled me closer and kissed my neck or forehead. A change seems to be in the air, perhaps it is just Autumn, perhaps it is us.

I have scheduled his surprise party for this coming Friday. So, we shall see if the conversation happens organically or if I bring it up.

 

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Ok, so weekday morning sex is difficult. I get it. I understand. The alarm goes off, we hit snooze, next thing you know, Type Geek was supposed to have left his house already to manage the long ass drive to work..in another state. Seriously, what is with the working in another state thing?! Luckily he works from home a LOT, so he doesn’t do this every day. Okay, let me back up a little.

Type Geek and I have been having problems getting together ever since he got back. There was work crisis, then brother crisis, then both. Finally, he nailed it down and said… Wednesday night? To which I said… Wednesday night! I made an INSANELY amazing gazpacho on Tuesday night and was planning on bringing that for dinner the next day. Always make gazpacho ahead of time. Making it ahead of time allows all of the flavors to merge. Mmmm, nom nom.

On Wednesday I had a few errands to run. I had a client and an interview at a restaurant. The recession has been hard on my business and it is failing swiftly. The housing market has also killed me, so I have begun to drown in the financial murky depths of near poverty. I have been looking for a job for some time, but there have been few, if any, bites. I finally decided that I need to bite the bullet and get back into the hospitality business. Therefore, I have been trying for server positions at some higher end foodie type restaurants. Wish me luck, I need it. Anyway, as I was saying, I had my errands and then I needed to get home and figure out the dog situation. IF I go to Type Geek’s house early, I have to bring the dog, if I go later… I miss out on awake time. Hmm, decisions, decisions. So, I won a second interview for next week at the restaurant, I picked up razors so I could do a shave before heading out, and OH, I ran into the cafe owner I went out on a date with months ago. I was in grabbing coffee at one of his shops and he was standing next to me, not noticing me. I nudged him and we started chatting and headed outside for a chat. He started asking my advice about this gal he has been dating. Cute, sexy, Jewish, BUT… he’s not ready for love. She doesn’t stop him in his tracks. However, he is afraid, by the way she has behaved, the things she has said, that she sees HIM as her future Mister. He wanted to know if I thought he should preemptively dump her. I suggested he talk to her about their status and his need to remain casual due to his history of being a serial monogamist for all the wrong reasons. Will he take my advice? Only time will tell. So, that was my day.

I got home later than I hoped, which automatically made the decision of dog or no dog, a no dog vote. By the time I left my house, the pup would only be alone for her average 10 hour night-time sleep cycle. She likes her sleep. Sometimes I need to drag her out of bed for her first pee in the morning or afternoon, as is SOMETIMES the case. Too funny. So, I finished getting ready, grabbed all my gear, the kickass gazpacho, clothes for the following morning and the head tingler I recently bought (seriously, just google it. AMAZING), before heading out the door. He picked me up on the corner close to the train station and we ran to the closest Whole Foods for a couple of things to finish my soup… namely, tiger shrimp, avocado, creme fraiche and lemon. He picked up salad fixings. Oh, and we grabbed a box of those Mary’s Gone Crackers… the herb flavor. Try them!

A half hour later we were both in the kitchen doing our things and 20 minutes later we were eating fresh fig stuffed burrata, a smoky mango gazpacho with lemon garlic tiger shrimp and topped with an avocado lemon zest creme fraiche. Mmm, I rock. I must also acknowledge that Type Geek makes a pretty good vinaigrette and his salad was damn yummy. Meal and conversation done, a glass of wine and further chatting post dinner, and then like an old married couple, we retired to the bedroom in a comfortable, yet YAWN, kind of boring manner. I’m like, wait, are you SERIOUSLY tucked under the covers already? Hello with the ravaging, where is the ravaging?! Sigh. Alas, the mid thirties and realities of life and midweek responsibilities have smacked us hard across our naughtiness. Oh well. We had nice comfortable couple like sex. YAWN. Then we went to bed.

Alarm, snooze. Alarm, snooze. Snoooooze. OH SHIT. When someone wakes up and says ,”Fuck Me” after looking at the clock, it generally ISN’T the way you would like to think. Sleep? Sex? Sleep? Sex? Ok, we are apparently old, sleep won out. Again. So, he jumped in the shower while I made coffee and threw together some local fruit, local honey and greek style yogurt for us. I added some Dorset Muesli to his (I’m sadly allergic. Sigh, it’s good stuff) and set the bowls down as he came in and poured our coffee. Yes, I like how comfortable we are, BUT, should we be THIS comfortable? Hmm.

I’ll see him this weekend, he is DJ’ing an event as a favor for me and then we are headed out to a birthday party for a friend of his. Hmm, do guys normally invite casual sexual gal pals to friend’s 40th b-day surprise shindigs? Should I be thinking uh-oh and complications? Hmm. This post had a lot of HMMS. Sigh.

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My ex broke up with her girlfriend…AGAIN. Hopefully it sticks this time. The relationship is volatile and dangerous. If everything that has happened now, isn’t sufficient reason to leave, it will take one of them in the hospital and/or jail in order to finally end this relationship. So, she called me after picking up her things from the other woman’s apartment and was headed home when I suggested that I buy her and her mother lunch, someplace cheap, so that they could just decompress and potentially have a few laughs, rather than wallowing in a bad place. She agreed.

We met halfway between where I was with my dog and a client and the, now, ex-girlfriend’s apartment. A Panera Bread cafe. They have this apple chicken salad I LOVE. Her mom had a ham and swiss on rye and my ex, she had the tomato soup…and picked at it, as she picks at all her food. We were sitting there listening to her dissect, again and again, this girlfriend and the actions that led up to this moment. It’s exhausting after a while. All you can do is be supportive, but sometimes, that is difficult when they can’t be supportive of themselves. It feels like a losing battle.

I realized as we sat there that there was a sex shop around the corner. Hmm, I need condoms. I have the Kimono Large because the guy I was hoping to be with when I bought them was jewish and a bit girthy than average. Type Geek is not jewish so the large would be wrong. After we finished our lunch, my ex and I wandered over while her mom sat in her car. Her mom was a little embarrassed. We walked in and she went off and pouted, looking around and thinking of her now ex. I stood staring at the condoms. So foreign to me after 12 years with women. I had hoped to get some regulars but they didn’t have the extra thin regular Kimonos. Hmmpf. I ended up picking up a couple Skyns and some Avanti Bares. The Polyisophrene material is supposedly far superior to latex in terms of heat transfer and feeling, both for the wearer and the receiver. We shall see. I also picked up some Sliquid lube, as I was told the Skyns can sometimes dry out quickly without additional assistance. Not good and good to know!

Perhaps I will get a chance to try them out on Saturday evening AND Sunday morning. One never does know what the world shall bring. Type Geek and I have that date with the dog and an outdoor music festival on Saturday afternoon. Sun and grass can be quite good for the libido, especially if I figure out how to wear something that isn’t suggestive but is. Hmm, demure sundress sans panties? All I know is this… I have been thinking of having sex on Type Geek’s kitchen table for days. Why? I am not sure, but surely, this would be quite fun. That is a small goal for this coming weekend.

The rest of the week is shaping up to be post worthy. Cooper Fiennes and I are grabbing a cocktail and a trip to the cinema tonight, and Brooklyn wants a dog free lunch meet up on Thursday. How will this be? I haven’t seen him in over a month I think. I have been able to subdue my feelings for him, compartmentalized them in a way that is safe and allows me to exist without constant thoughts. I miss him, yes. I miss that connection. I can’t continue as we have been however, I can’t continue being disregarded. I’m not sure what is going to come out in our conversation over lunch, if we make it to lunch. I might find him too frustrating to be around and just walk away. Perhaps, this is what needs to happen.

Sweet, sweet “hump day”, the week is at mid-point, but there are still so many stories that need to be told, adventures to go on, life to be lived, before the week cycles into the next. I can’t sleep with the Spaniard. Not yet. That would be too many men in 7 days. I do want some kisses against a wall and in the rain though. How hot would that be? Mmmm, yeah. Super hot.

So, what are your experiences out there with all the different types of condoms? Informal survey… comment with your most favorites, least favorites, what ones broke (the horror), what ones made you thing a steel drum around your cock would have given more sensation?! Inquiring minds, we want to know!

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What an interesting week I had! I got laid 3 times, in 4 days… by two different men. One, uber needy and slighty stalkeresque. The other, unexpectedly fabulous. But again, wow, no sex for MONTHS…and then 2 men in 4 days. I feel so… dirty, no. Naughty? No. Hmm, what is that word? Oh, relieved. Ha! YES, that IS what I feel.

In a week so much has changed though. Mr. Lawyer McBratty, whom I slept with on Wednesday night and whose bedroom skills fell into the category of pleasant mediocrity, was just TOO much to bear in terms of personality flaws. He began systematically insulting everything I was passionate about if he didn’t understand it or like it. From my musical tastes to my spiritual and philosophical leanings to my relationships with animals. He said that I was intelligent with good common sense, so why was I being irrational in my interests? He was being argumentative in order to make my arguments more precise, he explained. Oh, I thought it was to ensure that he would never get laid again. Needless to say, but, he is completely out of the picture in only 6 days!

Type Geek has won himself the gift of regular sex after taking a surprise turn from shy non move maker to my new oral sex rock god. Can we all say hallelujah?! All hail the man who can get me to curl up in a ball and break into hysterics. (Does anyone else out there laugh hysterically when they cum? Am I an anomaly?)

Now, the bookends. In my weekend post I mentioned having chatted up a hot McHotty from Spain on the dating site and arranging to have coffee with him on Saturday afternoon, prior to my date with Type Geek. The hottie, in person, was even hotter than he was in virtual 2-d. Yes, I keep saying hot. A mix of Bradley Cooper and Ralph Fiennes, I nicknamed him Cooper Fiennes. We had a great few hours together on Saturday. Very easy to spend time with him.

My date with Type Geek spanned the Saturday evening into Sunday early afternoon. Evening and morning sex, multiple meals, and lots of time spent naked in bed. An excellent pinnacle to the weekend. I spent a few hours at home on Sunday, wrote a post for this blog, showered, ate a real meal and then I received an email from Cooper Fiennes. He was in the city with his childhood best friend, a man visiting from Spain. If I was in the city, would I like to meet up with them for coffee? The dog and I decided that coffee was a great idea, if it meant strolling around with a dangerously handsome man who finds me attractive.

His friend was a darling man. I bought all of us coffee and we sat in the sun with my dog. The boys even took turns walking her, something they found entertaining because of her inherent youthful exuberance. When she and I walked them to the train and said our ciao’s, she whined frantically as they ascended the escalators to the platform. They had made quite the impression on my little girl. It was a nice end to a very fun, very sexy weekend. Great sex bookended by coffee with a gorgeous foreigner. Yes, please.

Now, the new week has begun. It has already begun to fall into place. I had a re-exam by my dentist, you may remember him as the youngster who likes rough sex… but later admitted that it was only because he was trying to emotionally protect himself. He is a doll…and now, he is my dentist. He graduates in a few short weeks and will be moving to Minnesota sadly, so, we have three appointments this week in order to ensure he has completed all my fillings prior to his getting signed off and cleared for diploma. In addition to that, I was going to go to NYC to see my Virtual Sex Guru pal present an art piece he has been working on, however, things fell apart at the 10 o’clock hour. With a sudden free evening, Cooper Fiennes has stepped up for a night of cocktails and the cinema. Saturday is an outdoor music festival with Type Geek and my pooch, with a high potential for naughtiness later that evening. The topper of the week, however, is this. Guess who started texting the hell out of me this afternoon? Guess who really wants to see me and have lunch. Guess who might need to wait til next week. If you said Brooklyn, you would be correct. My feelings for him have not changed, however, until HIS ability to process and respectively assimilate his feelings for me into his life, in a way other than how he has been doing it the last couple of months, I refuse to jump through hoops and make myself available at his whim. I will not contort my reality in order to fit him in. It’s not my job.

Sigh. I think this may be a very interesting summer. A hot summer fling with a divorced Spanish man who is unnecessarily good-looking, regular naughtiness with an ocd designer, and the myriad of other men who may happen upon my lap, or I upon theirs, in the coming months. May we all have some adventures worth talking about.

Tuesday posts are web syndicated by www.thenewgay.net

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Heavy Metal Choo Choo and I are meeting in an hour, tomorrow I am going out with this business finance guy who just got back from a month in Costa Rica, then there is a second date with Frenchie (ooh, laa laaaaa) on Friday, a second with Type Geek on Saturday and on Sunday, coffee with a Modernist Obsessed Architect. Exhale.

Quite the week I have planned. 5 consecutive nights, 5 dates with 5 different men! OY! As for what happened with Internet Sex guy… nada. Sigh. He got caught up in a call and I was tired so I went to bed. Is this the first sign of getting old?

I’ll give a full update tonight (or tomorrow if I am toooo sleepy) of Date Night #1. Off to fetch the laundry, and make myself pretty(aka, semi gussied up) in under 30 minutes. Aack.

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A friend of mine ran the Boston Marathon on Monday. Because I couldn’t make it to the festivities, I was logged into a text alert system the Marathon had set up. He came in at 3:16:38 ! Good for him. So, while he spent the morning running his ass for sheer craziness, I spent it moving shit around my condo. At this moment, 5 hours since I started, it is worse than when I began. Hmm. Can’t quite figure that one out. I will chalk it up to being a Pisces with horrible organizational skills.

I did take a few breaks during the afternoon however. The dog and I shared some of my favorite raw trail mix… goji berries, mulberries, pistachios and cacao nibs. She likes the goji and mulberries. We listened to a Pandora station of Mogwai which is a band that came highly recommended by Frenchie. Then, I spoke to Type Geek around 3, we considered getting coffee but we were both far too involved in stuff today and taking a break for coffee wasn’t worth the break in our own personal chore fulfilling momentum. We rain checked for tomorrow. Frenchie and I emailed and briefly talked about trying to catch up with each other later in the week and someone whom I know very little about. He works on trains and likes metal. Hmmm. So a Heavy Metal Thomas the Train? Heavy Metal Choo-Choo is his new name. Ha! He and I don’t have much in common according to our profiles but he seems nice, so a coffee can’t hurt, right?

I talk a lot about getting coffee or tea on first dates. I have only gone to a movie once on a date and that was Brooklyn, on my birthday. I don’t do the dinner thing much either, sometimes it happens as a natural progression of the evening but I like to have the flexible outs if I need them. Not to mention, it’s a cheap and non-committal way to know if you can sit and talk with the other person for even a half hour, before being committed to waiting for an entrée to come out of a busy kitchen. What do other people do on first dates?

So, it’s been a lazy day, OH, but not without zero excitement… I received quite the thrilling photo via text message from my Internet Sex Pal in NYC. Sigh. He wants to Skype later… and after a text message like the one I received, unless a date suddenly presents itself, how could I possibly say no? Tune in tomorrow for all the juicy news on my Skype date. In the meantime, since I am leaving on an UP note, check out my new favorite, and totally inappropriate, website… www.awkwardboners.com The photo for today’s post comes from their site. It’s worth a look for some hearty laughs.

Off to the post office, a snack, some iced coffee (perhaps) and then back home for some more rearranging, cleaning, showering and primping before I get my private personal Skype show later. I hope everyone has a fun night planned.

Tuesday post are web-syndicated by www.thenewgay.net

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I know, I KNOW. WHY am I going out with the Doppelganger again and WHY haven’t I told him about my connection to his brother? Well, he still hasn’t said his last name. There still isn’t enough linking me to his brother AND I guess I assume this will fizzle out before it gets there and SO, there is no point in saying anything. He’s nice and interested, albeit his attention skills are lacking and he is awkward, at best. I almost feel sorry for him. Being the older brother of someone soooo smooth and easy and HOT.

We met up at a small bistro/café and I had a (shocker) dark and stormy (As did he. The one thing he has on his brother…an expanded palate.) and grazed on the two appetizers he ordered. After numerous conversations, he still forgets about my food sensitivities and offers me things I cannot eat. Umm, remember, we have talked about this, several times. That is one of the attention issues I talk about. I seriously question whether he has ADHD. He’s easily distracted except when he kisses me. Seems like that is the only time he stops and focuses rather than looking around like a sugar binged toddler in a toy store.

Yes, that means I kissed him again. What am I thinking? I don’t KNOW. So we leave the bistro/cafe and it’s  semi early so we walk a bit to grab some hot beverages (cappuccino for him, chai for me) from the only coffee-shop I know to be open on a weeknight past 9 pm. I purchase the beverages while he is in the restroom. My way of being nice and thanking him for picking up the pricey part of our date.

We walked to the train, smacked in the face by the freezing February wind. I walked him to his station, mine was across the street. We said goodnight and as we were kissing outside the station, a turning car honked at us. It was a very funny moment actually. One he mentioned later in text, when letting me know he had arrived home safe and wanted to make sure I had as well. He’s nice. He’s blah but he’s nice. I KNOW. I KNOW.

So, I get home, and am dealing with the dog, making a snack, and checking my email when a drunken 25-year-old texts me that he’s missing our nightly banter. He’s flirty McFlirty and laying it on heavily. He wants to have an Anti-Valentines day date with me, mainly because I have plans Saturday night already. I told him, no romance. Action-Adventure film with violence and explosions, nachos/buffalo wings/or something equally unsexy, and Hard Cider or booze… no wine. Those were my rules. He then fell asleep while texting something about making out with me. What is up with that? I will give him the benefit of the doubt for being a full-time law student with a full-time job and the want to maintain a social life, which explains the 1:30 a.m. drunken text flirts but geez, I thought that one of the benefits of younger men was their supposed stamina?!

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