Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Young Ones’ Category

We met at Starbucks before the concert. SHORT and OMG… SO GAY. How does he NOT know that he is gay? The entire world knows that this 32-year-old man, studying to be a nurse, is a raging queer. He laments that most of his friends are gay or mailmen OR gay mailmen. Ya think? Really? Wasn’t there a mailman in The Village People?

We stopped for Pho before the show and were seated next to a former colleague of mine and her husband whom I have never gotten on with. I actually avoided even saying hello to him. I spoke with the woman for a few moments, realized we were both going to the same show and sighed in relief when they finished up 10 minutes before us. I desperately needed to tell my gay date what a douche bag her husband was.

The show was phenomenal. The opening act quirky and while at first a little too hip and annoying, I must admit that her thumb piano and high-pitched voice eventually won me over because her lyrics were just THAT fun. Robot Ponies. Really?!

The main act came on… and they played two sets and a few songs for encore. I love his voice and if i could have anyone be the soundtrack for my life, it would be this man and his band of loons.

The bartender at the venue made the strongest well drinks EVER and I found myself very buzzed off two drinks. Since I knew I was not going to be kissing the emasculated gay nurse in training, I tested Mr. Decade and told him to meet me for a night-cap. He actually responded that he was planning on going to bed early. Umm, when the 35-year-old woman who you have tried to convince to give you a legitimate chance, text messages you from a concert, admitting to being tipsy, and inviting you out for a night-cap, you do NOT say no. I responded back that he should reconsider because I wasn’t sure how many times I might offer. Needless to say, he agreed to meet me.

We met at a place around the corner from his apartment and next to my train station. We curled up on a couch in the corner, had a couple drinks and he put his arm around me. He did so at first in a semi-awkwardly, not sure what was acceptable way, but then loosened up. We spent an hour sprawled out on the couch chatting and staring at the patrons and the fish tank before I realized I had ten minutes before my train was coming.

On the walk over to the station I felt a bit bratty, grabbed some snowballs and jettisoned them at him. I knew he was feeling too gentlemanly to really throw back AND he wasn’t wearing gloves. Ha Ha. Outside the station he reached down to give a peck goodnight, again, unsure of where I was leading him or authorizing him to go. I had to assert myself a bit, pulling him back in for a more authentic round of kissing that happily left us both a little smirky on our separate walks home. Not bad for a 25-year-old.

So, what does everyone think. Should I give the 25-year-old a real chance or is it doomed to be messy and obnoxious because of his age and our age difference? Comment with your opinions!

Read Full Post »

The weekend was productive. I had a non-romantic study(him)/work(me) “date” with my young Mr. Decade from last week. We met at a local coffee-house and spread out for some serious nose to the grindstone action. We did pretty well even. While I didn’t get all the changes made to my corporate home page, I did get a good start and built up some worthwhile momentum, which carried me through to the majority of the evening, long after I had gone home and would have normally given up to surf the Internet. Mr. Decade was good. Not a date, as I am trying to decide if I should give him a real chance or not. I’m not sure if the 10 years difference is an obstacle I can climb over. He’s sweet though.  He had gone out to a party after we separated Saturday afternoon and late that evening, whilst I was still in html coding hell, he IM’d me.  He tried subtle flirting. I dodged it. He tried not so subtle flirting, I was still able to navigate past that. Then he said, “All I am saying is, if you give me a chance, I just MIGHT curl those toes of yours.”  Umm, JESUS, young man! OY! Nervous laughter on my end as I asked why he is interested in me, 10 years his senior, to which his response was,”You are smart, witty, gorgeous AND sexy. Why wouldn’t I be interested in you?” Pretty good response, I must admit. We said our good-nights and I worked for a few more hours.

The time flew. 11 pm, 12:30, 2, and then 4 am. I had made plans earlier in the week to meet up for Sunday brunch with the Doppelganger, a.k.a. the Peruvian’s bigger brother (eek). I wasn’t feeling it Saturday night though. I really wanted a lazy Sunday with no commitments suddenly. I felt like an asshole but I had to feign illness. I wrote him at 4:15 am and complained of an overwhelming malaise that seemed to be worsening as the hours stretched. I felt it was a kinder excuse than the truth, which was that I wasn’t in the mood suddenly. This would have disappointed him and potentially hurt his feelings, neither of which were my intention or goal. Speaking of intentions, neither of the brothers know about me yet, but I promise, I will tell Doppelganger soon, UNLESS, after the next date, there is total clarity that we have zero chance for anything beyond friendship. I am trying to weigh him separately from his brother, and it is difficult to avoid the comparisons at every turn, but I am trying to do that. So, I sent the email and woke at 11 am to see that he had received and accepted my rain-check with a voice of concern and advice to load up on “c and Theraflu”. I didn’t do either BUT I did load up on coffee at Starbucks.

The dog and I were BORED come 2 pm. We decided a wander around the waterfront area was exactly what we needed. We took to the streets, both properly bundled in our jackets and boarded the train. At the waterfront we roamed around a little bit, ran into our Mr. Decade on the street near the cafe and stopped into his place for a bit to warm up. The pooch proceeded to show off and make out with him and his roommate while rolling on the carpeted floor in absolute glee. She is a funny dog. We stayed about 45 minutes before heading back home, past another Starbucks, on to the train and home for some amazing gourmet nachos made by… me.

I had a few more hours of work to do and I was exhausted. Even with the caffeine I was finding myself nodding off as I finished some work on the home page. I took a break to check my emails and deal with some of them and noticed that PayPal had sent me another note. They are the merchant services provider for my business and we’ve had some issues back and forth lately that we have been working through. These issues have required many updates, changes, blah blah blah. SO, I didn’t think anything of the email telling me that I needed to update my info. Of course I needed to update my account information. I just spoke with PayPal two days prior about that very issue.

I woke up Monday morning, wandered to Starbucks, and was informed that my card was declined. Hmm. Thousands in my account but a $3 espresso drink makes it come to a grinding halt? Just then it all made sense. I called my bank first to verify my theory. Then I called PayPal to let them know to warn their users. 20 minutes later I was in my banker’s office and he was cutting up my card and informing me that after the money is paid out, they will begin an affidavit to the fraud. After that point they launch an investigation and then he told me that it could take up to 60 days to get a full refund. 60 days and a bank account that was wiped clean. This will be an interesting week. I can’t believe that I fell for a phishing scam. I had plans to woo my Musician/Assoc Prod/Writer guy at a concert this week, to pick up some materials at Home Depot for a little cosmetic work I have to do on my condo and to buy dog food. I guess the universe had other plans. I may have to ramp up the dating over the next 60 days just to ensure I have dinner. I am not the type to date because I am poor and need to eat but hmmm, it is awfully tempting.

Our Tuesday post’s are now being web syndicated by The New Gay. For more intelligent queer coverage of culture, ideas and events, check out www.thenewgay.net

Read Full Post »

Anatomy of a Decade

We met for drinks and rosemary french fries. Conversation was nice, he is adorable, yet every time I looked at him, I thought of this:

1975– Weather Underground bombs State Dept in DC, Wheel of Fortune debuts, Watergate, Rocky Horror Picture Show opens on Broadway, Vietnam War, Bill Gates founds Microsoft, Saturday Night Live debuts, several countries declare independence from Portugal, Drew Barrymore and I are born. World population is 4,068,109,000

1976-US vetoes UN resolution calling for an independent Palestinian state, Apple Computer Company is formed, Tiananman riots, The Ramones release first album, Jimmy Carter wins presidency, Legionnaires disease first surfaces, U2 forms in Dublin highschool, Bob Marley is asassinated, Saul Bellow wins Nobel prize in literature and Audrey Tautou is born.

1977– Commodore computer is released, snow falls for the only time in history in Miami, Star Wars opens in cinemas, The Clash are formed, Apple ll computers released, The NYC blackout and Summer of Sam serial killings, Elvis Presley and Groucho Marx die, Orlando Bloom and Chris Martin of ColdPlay born.

1978-Garfield makes it’s debut, Ted Bundy captured, Larry Flynt shot and paralyzed, first Unabomber attack, first test tube baby is born, Jimmy Carter signs bill into law allowing home brewing of beer and he authorizes the minting of Susan B Anthony dollar, Jim Jones instigates Jonestown cult murder-suicides, Harvey Milk and George Moscone are assasinated, girl “hates Mondays” and open fires on San Diego school, Ashton Kutcher and Nikolai Fraiture of the Strokes are born.

1979-Star Trek: The Motion Picture premieres, Iran Hostage Crisis, 2 families flee East Germany by balloon, ESPN debuts, Michael Jackson releases Off The Wall, Ixtoc 1 oil spill releases upwards of 400+ million gallons of oil into S.Gulf of Mexico, Margaret Thatcher becomes Prime Minister, Three Mile Island nuclear plant disaster, compact discs are created, and Evangeline Lilly of television series Lost is born.

1980– Congress enacts CERCLA a.k.a. Superfunds, John Lennon is assasinated,Ethernet DIX standard is created, Jimmy Carter defeats Ed Kennedy for DNC nomination, RNC drops support of Equal Rights Amendment, CNN is launched, Ian Curtis of Joy Division dies, Pac Man is released, and Elin Nordegren (Woods) is born.

1981– Ronald Reagan becomes president, Walter Cronkite gives last CBS Evening News broadcast, CDC reports first cases of AIDS, Major League Baseball strikes, Sandra Day O’Connor becomes first female Supreme Court Judge, Adam Walsh is kidnapped and murdered, Lady Diana and Prince Charles marry, IBM computer  is released for $1,565 and has a with a 4.77 MHz Intel 8088 processor, Iran Contra Scandal, MTV is launched, and Brandon Flowers of the Killers is born.

1982-Canada gains full political independence from Great Britain, The Weather Channel debuts, Cal Ripken Jr. begins his streak, Equal Rights Amendment falls short on votes and Christian Right take credit, Pan Am flight 759 crashes, Lawn Chair Larry takes flight, First emoticons are released, International Day of Peace is formed, Michael Jackson releases Thriller, the United States goes into a recession, Commodore 64 computer is released, and now famous American Idol contestant Adam Lambert is born.

1983-Vanessa Williams becomes first black woman to be crowned Miss America, Tom Brokaw becomes NBC Nightly News Anchor, Red Hot Chili Peppers release first album, Michael Jackson’s Thriller video debuts, Microsoft Word is released, the DeLorean ceases production, the Chicken McNugget is introduced, MLK,Jr Day is signed into federal law, and Mila Kunis is born.

1984-Apple Macintosh is introduced, Michael Jackson wins 8 Grammys, Pierre Trudeau retires, The longest game in MLB history occurs between Milwaukee Brewers and Chicago White Sox, Virgin Atlantic takes first flight, Vanessa Williams resigns as Miss America over nude photo scandal, Crack Cocaine makes appearance in L.A., Ronald Reagan makes off the cuff joke about bombing Russia…ooops, they were ON THE AIR, and Scarlett Johansson is born.

1985-Minolta releases world’s first autofocus SLR, Mike Tyson has his first pro fight, DNA is first used in a criminal case, Dian Fossey is murdered in Rwanda, Windows 1.0 is released, Calvin & Hobbes debuts,teacher  Christa McAuliffe learns she will ride aboard Space Shuttle Challenger the next year,Spanish galleon Nuestra Señora de Atocha is found with treasures worth $400 million, South Africa ends ban on interracial marriages, and my date from Wednesday night… was born near Ithaca, New York. World population is 4,830,979,000

Read Full Post »

His photos were a little strangely disturbing but I knew that there was NO WAY he actually looked like that in real life. He must have a condition that results in him making a dumb ass face every time a camera is pointed at him. I know many people who suffer from this condition. I am blessed. Years behind the camera taught me how to be in front of the camera without much incident. So, I agree to meet him because he seems like a chill guy with some varied interests and no serious issues except a not so recent divorce and a child. The divorce and the child are a plus actually. At 31, this means that the probability of his wanting another marriage or child anytime soon has been severely reduced. I am stoked. We chat a bit through email and decide to meet for coffee at 2:30 in the neighborhood I’ll be working in today.

I arrive a few minutes before him and use it as an opportunity to use the restroom. When I come out of the restroom I notice him at the condiment station doctoring up his cup of joe. He grabs us a table and I grab a tea and we sit and chat. Conversation flows easily, we start talking about his 3-year-old daughter, my job and what it is that I do, his job in PR and then the exes come into the conversation. We have been sitting there for 1 hr. and 30 min., of course the exes are starting to creep in. Just as we are getting asked to leave, because the café is closing at 4, I spring it on him. I just can’t lie. If you say HE ,in reference to my ex fiancé, I shall correct you. So, I did this and knew that one of two things would occur. We would leave the cafe and he would say that it was nice meeting me and we would part ways OR he would suggest we go somewhere else.

We spent the next 3.5 hours sitting at a bar around the corner that is in the middle of undergoing renovation. Their taps didn’t work so I couldn’t get a dark and stormy, as their ginger beer is on tap (how cool is that but also momentarily annoying) and no coffee, as the coffee machine wasn’t hooked up yet. I ended up with Pinot Grigio, which, far from my favorite is better than the usual swill California Chardonnay’s these types of places have as their house white. Cheekbone Guy had tonic, just tonic. He isn’t a drinker anymore and that is a plus. Speaking of pluses, by the way, he was actually quite attractive in a very Nantucket, plaid Bermuda shorts, chocolate lab kind of way. The cheekbones are, in fact, prominent but not disturbing as they are in his photos. He does have the weird photo affliction I mentioned earlier in the post.  

Overall our date lasted 5 hours which works out to roughly: 2 glasses of wine, one water, 2 tonics, 2 large coffees and 2 large hot teas for the pair of us. I am such a cheap date. We talked about everything you are advised not to; such as, politics, religion, sexuality, addiction, crazy exes, actual financial numbers on our homes, and past relationships. We covered a lot. Sober. While we didn’t get thrown out of any public places for indecent and lewd acts, he was attractive and showed discreet polite flirtation and interest. He commented several times about things he noticed or liked and began the statements with, “if we actually start dating…” we should, you could, it would… He was very nice.

I walked him from the bar to the theatre around the corner where he was meeting his friend. He bent down, hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. That’s cute. No one has done the cheek kiss yet. Produce, check. Rosemary, check. Red roses, check. Leaving me with the tab, check. But no, no cheek kiss. I usually disapprove of such half kisses but it didn’t feel like a peck. It felt like a genuinely nice guy who is respectful and navigating boundaries he believes should exist early on. Bravo.

Read Full Post »

Future Lawyer and I were chatting online tonight and it became clear that he really wants something different from what I can offer. I am nearly 6 years older, and was a lesbian longer than he has even been sexually active. His life has been, and is, very safe and planned out. Mine has always been unconventional and without safety net. I can not be that girl that he needs, no matter how gorgeous he thinks I am or how great I think his kissing is. Besides, I always knew that it would be very short term for me. So, with memories of a sexy make out session to Mahler, and getting thrown out of a mall for almost committing acts of public indecency, we decide that we should pass and just be friends. 

What comes next… a coffee date with a man whose cheekbones frighten me and cocktails with the owner of my favorite coffee house.

Read Full Post »

Can I just start this post by saying, NO, I most certainly did NOT get fucked last night. SIGH. Future Lawyer is a sweet, romantic Rilke loving, red rose buying, back massage giving ivy league preppy. It’s so cute and if his lips weren’t so good, it would be too cloying for me. Generally, I would be frowning upon such behavior, as it has always felt so trite and contrived, however Future Lawyer is genuinely that guy. The Rilke on his bookcase is well-worn, not placed there just to impress the ladies. He has cried during more episodes of NPR’s This American Life for god’s sake than I have watched romantic comedies.

He met my dog and I at the train station and we quickly walked over to Starbucks for something hot to keep the bitter cold at bay for the walk back to the dorms. Coffee in hands, we  wandered through the maze of university buildings until we reached his Hall. As we walked in, he gave me flowers. My first internal reaction was that of mild discomfort. I have never liked to be given roses by anyone because they always seemed so formulaic and pedestrian. (Pedestrian is a word my ex fiancé used. I actually find it to be one of the most insulting words. She once said how much she hated that our problems were so pedestrian. What did she want? Some epic dilemma and great struggle?) I took a breath, shut down my inner dialogue and looked at him and how sweet, kind, AND sincere he was and then kicked my inner dialogue in the shin and put it in time out for the night. He hung my coat, poured me some wine and showed me around his suite, which was roughly the size of a small NYC one bedroom, minus a kitchen. We then picked out Slumdog Millionaire, since neither of us had seen it, and curled up on the couch in the dark. Occasional kisses were had. Wine was drunk, Michel Cluizel Grand Noir 85% chocolate was consumed and the dog was walked far enough to find my Future Lawyer a slice of pizza at midnight.

When we walked back into the suite, he disappeared for a moment to use mouth wash after the pizza. I really didn’t mind. I like spicy pepperoni. I laughed at him and wiped the wet bit off his lip. His embarrassment quickly departed as I started to kiss him. Remember, we were kicked out of a mall last week for making out. He may be schmaltzy, preppy and shorter than what I have gone for BUT he has a set of lips on him that just don’t quit. We kissed for a few minutes but then were distracted by the undergrads screaming outside his door. Music was a necessity, and somehow Mahler ended up being chosen.  As the music intensified, so did our kissing and eventually he backed me into his bedroom and locked my dog out with the door. She was horrified as she isn’t used to being separated from me by a closed-door. The lights went down and the next 45 minutes ranked up there as one of the hottest make out sessions in my history. Thank you Mahler. Eventually the composition changed however and it started to ruin the groove. I gave him the link to my online Trip Hop Playlist and ran into the living room to grab a hair-clip.

I patted my sad puppy on the head, dug in my purse and grabbed a hair clip. Prior to coming over I had tried to wax my legs a bit, so they wouldn’t be so bad on the likely chance that we ended up in contorted naked positions. I couldn’t do anything about the Brazilian. Those are NOT DIY jobs. I also bought a box of condoms, just in case. I know that most men purchase grocery store or drug store condoms, so I stopped by the sex shop and bought some Kimono Micro Thin japanese ones. When they make thin condoms, why do men go for regular? It’s better to be prepared and it isn’t the mans responsibility to worry about my sexual health and wish to stay childless, so I tossed one in my jeans pocket as I head back into the bedroom, hair pulled up for better long-haired girl on top make out action.

Back in the bedroom we find our groove again with the help of Morcheeba. Now, my pants come off, as do his and then he says it, after I am so turned on that I can’t see straight. He tells me that he doesn’t think it’s a good idea for us to have sex tonight. He wants to wait a little longer. AAACK! I am wearing one article of clothing, sprawled out with mussed up hair, looking at him in shock and disbelief through sexually charged eyes and thinking he might be kidding. He might start laughing at any moment and just take me. But he doesn’t, and I whimper, and we continue to make out for a while but some of the sheen is gone.

I stayed the night and I slept like I do at home, nude. If you want to wake up to a naked woman whom you have called gorgeous several times over the last 12 hours and feel tempted, that’s your fault buddy. Within an hour of waking up, we were out the door and parting ways at the train. I made a quick detour and grabbed an americano for the ride.

On the train ride home I was incredibly, ridiculously, crazy horny. I texted my Internet Sex man from NYC and made a fleeting playful remark about how horny I was and  why wasn’t he local? Surprisingly, I received a message back within moments. Apparently he found the timing of my message fitting as he had just been thinking of me. He checked Skype and I wasn’t there and assumed that he would be having a solo session. I laughed when the next text message was a photo of his erection. He has the perfect match of voyeur and exhibitionist traits to my own and along with my Pac NW man, they are my sexually deviant saviors on this journey. When I am not getting laid locally, I can sign into Skype and get some virtual action with a non stranger. It’s a wonderful set up that ends in my napping happily and a bit less frustrated than I had a few hours earlier. Sweet live kisses and hot internet sex. The world was a beautiful place today.

Read Full Post »

An IM buddy of mine told me tonight that I am a trifecta. I laughed and asked what he meant. He replied that it was because I have a tendency to make men nervous, hungry and horny. He said that it wasn’t just my ability to create such reactions in men, but my ability to create them simultaneously. Quite often he leaves our chats feeling a strange combination of all three I was informed. Should I be tickled by this information? It is one of the most amusing compliments I have received in a while. However, considering that he is 26, getting looked at by an attractive woman is potentially enough to send him into a tizzy. BUT, the fact that I can make a 6 course gourmet meal while scantily clad and maintaining an intelligent politically tinged conversation makes me a little different from most of the women he meets. 

Tomorrow… potential overnight date with Future Lawyer. We want to do a low-key dinner and movie at his place (also known as the dorm, ahem, cough, ha ha ha. I have NEVER made out at a dorm!) and there are several obstacles. Parking is non-existent, public transportation ends early, and taxi’s hate coming to my neighborhood. He then spoke up and said that he had assumed I might stay over and hoped it wasn’t being too presumptuous. I then mentioned that my dog cannot be left alone for that long at which point he told me to bring her! Can he have a dog in his room? Even as a Resident Advisor? I am feeling a bit insecure about this though. It isn’t about him or how attracted I am to him. It’s about the fact that my next waxing appointment isn’t until the 10th! This means I have far more body hair below the waist than I normally like. I also ate far too much macaroni and cheese tonight so I am currently feeling far more like a pudgy Sasquatch than a sexy brazilian waxed trifecta. Sigh.

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts - Older Posts »

%d bloggers like this: