Over the last week, I have personally paid for the college education of one or more children of executives working for the Kleenex company. A scratchy throat turned head cold turned severe lung congestion almost turned pneumonia had made it a far less enjoyable week that I was hoping for. Gorgeous weather plagued me at the end of the week, taunting me with activities I couldn’t be a part of because of how sick I was. Hours and days spent upright in bed while I drifted in and out of sleep in between periods of extreme coughing, screaming sinus headache pain, tearing eyes as if the Lifetime network did a Nora Ephron movie marathon the day before my period, and much nose blowing. By Thursday night my nose was multiple colors of raw and the chances of my scheduled Friday evening date with the English Prof actually happening, were erased with each hack and sniffle.
I awoke at 1 on Friday afternoon to the sun shining through my window and 69 degrees registering on the weather.com app from my mobile phone laying astride me in bed. Fresh air sounded like a fair solution to my cabin fever and also perhaps an answer to my breathing issues. So, I harnessed the pup and decided to wander off on a stroll. I had texted English Prof that it wasn’t looking like a good idea for me to have a cocktail date night, as I was still quite ill. Turned out I was close to where he was, so he decided to meet up with my dog and I for some of our stroll.
An hour later, we met outside a local coffee shop and then decided to walk along the river, then through the square and then back up to my neighborhood. What was my opinion of him? He was nice enough. Armenian by descent, tall enough to not be dwarfed by me in heels, average build, blah blah blah. Why the blah blah blah? I find it disingenuous when someone showers you with flowery compliments and makes plans to go on road trips, over seas journeys, and weekend getaways, when they haven’t met you yet. He began his comments prior to our meeting, and after we parted ways he told me how pretty I was. Sick as a dog, pretty is the last thing I felt and honestly, while I looked ok, pretty is hardly the word I would have used. I just found it to be all a bit much.
I mentioned my wariness at his approach and he said, relax, I’m not on bent knee proposing, however this was his go to remark the other 2 times I voiced my discomfort with something he said. Always a dismissive, “I’m not on my knee declaring my love to you”, or “I’m not asking you to marry me, I just dig you”. Well, if a pattern of behavior isn’t working, if you are eliciting comments that it makes another uncomfortable, perhaps consider a new approach. Only, he doesn’t.
On my walk home from dropping him at the train, Type Geek texted me. Asking if I was around, I told him I was super sick. I wasn’t ready to deal with him that night.
The weekend was spent alternating between sleep or work. While I felt worse than I had all week, I was unable to get out of working and fed myself meds to make it through, then crashed hard and slept from the moment I walked in the door, until nearly an hour before I needed to work. I would wake to texts from English Prof ,”Hey Gorgeous,”, “Hey Beautiful”, “Hey Sexy, how are you feeling?” It wore me out, the accolades. I finally told him that I needed him to be… just a little less. Again,” I just dig you, I’m not proposing to you.” YAWN. It is obvious that he isn’t going to listen or adapt behavior to make me more comfortable.
Tonight is Tuesday. Tonight I have a 7 pm sit down with Type Geek. The first time I have seen him face to face in 3 months. I will show up, my chin quivering, fear and hope, love and lust, and faith… all of these present in my heart. I’m not sure how to end this post. I guess that this post’s ending is as open-ended as my sit down with Type Geek tonight.