There is this great website called Overheard Everywhere , which has some of the most brilliant overheard comments of all time posted by the individuals whose ears were lucky enough to be close at the time. This is one of my favorites, “Hipster girl: He eats pork, but he won’t eat pussy. He’s a really bad Jew.” If I had overheard that, I would have spit out whatever beverage or food I was consuming at that moment in an abrupt burst of hysterical laughter. We all know my love of the Jew. The Jewish cock is a thing of wonder and beauty. Although, I must say, a lot can be said about an uncut cock as well. Before I met Type Geek, I had zero experience with an uncut penis. I hadn’t ever seen one in person, only photos. My limited experience with cock from my teens and early twenties presented the average “normal” penis to me, nothing exciting. Certainly no Jews and no uncut boys.
Regardless of all of that, I do have one issue with the comment. How can you NOT eat pussy if you fuck it? Really?! For some of us ladies, that is the ONLY way we really get off. That is one issue with lesbians that never occurred. Lesbians love to eat pussy. I think there is an unwritten law in the Society of Lesbians book of by-laws that states, “she who eat not of pussy, not get own pussy eaten in return.” Alright, maybe it was Confucius or Buddha. Maybe it was just the first lesbian I met at 17 who wanted to fuck me so badly, she checked out the Lesbian Joy of Sex from her college library and offered to lend it to me. She was stocky, with a mohawk, furry legs, ripped fishnets and combat boots AND a die-hard anti-male feminist. Now, I know that NOT all feminists are anti-male. SHE just happened to be. She was also a writer, a bad one, and wrote scathing tales of those that crossed her path. She never changed their names because, as she said, “no names have been changed, because no one is innocent.” Needless to say, she was intense in all the WRONG ways and no, I never had sex with her. There is probably a story out there somewhere about it.