6 months ago I started this blog with no idea where I would be in a week, let alone 6 months. I just wanted to start chronicling the journey. Surely I wasn’t the first gay woman to suddenly question her predilections, let alone act on her heterosexual curiosity. I remember thinking that I was going to generate a lot of back lash from the gay segment of my personal community. Interestingly enough, the hetero’s were the ones that were the most resistant. As if I had tasted something they hadn’t and subsequently I wasn’t allowed back in their house with my proverbially soiled feet. I almost lost one friendship with a friend of nearly 20 years, until I finally called him on his insecurities. Interestingly, some of the men in my life were angry. How could I, after that many years, suddenly jump the fence, without considering THEM an option. Many of them are married or partnered up, by the way. So, their egos were bruised. In the end, all friendships remain in tact and everyone is fine with, what now appears to be, my ho-hum, incident free crossing into this other country.
The one thing I haven’t settled on, however, is what am I defining myself as? Do I need to be defining myself? I don’t feel straight. I definitely no longer feel gay. Am I queer? If forced to make a verbal statement? I’m not sure.
At Pride last weekend, in conversation with my former neighbor, she told me about how many of her friends are now half-gay. Not bisexual, not gay, NOT straight but sorta in this ambiguous middle ground of mixed greys. Half-gay. Interesting.
Have any of you noticed a recent jump in your GLBT friends making changes in their predilections? Have you done so personally? Tell me your stories.